Been Cheated On? Help Is Here…
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer
Being cheated on is definitely one of the most emotionally painful experiences a person can go through. It leaves both men and women extremely hurt and lost as to what to do next. The following relationship help tips give you a guide on how to move through this heartbreaking time.
Relationship Help After Your Partner Cheats Tip #1:
The Shock Of It
The first step is to allow the time to get past the shock of the situation. It is important to give yourself the time you need in order to attain a clear head before making any definite decisions about your relationship.
Relationship Help After Your Partner Cheats Tip #2:
Find Out Why
If it is at all possible, discover the real reason your partner cheated. Many times men and women cheat because they feel their needs are not being met within the relationship. Other times it is due to the fact that the physical intimacy has been lacking in the relationship.
Relationship Help After Your Partner Cheats Tip #3:
Make A Decision
As soon as the reality of the cheating becomes real to you, it is time to make a decision as to what you will do next. I am often asked if a couple can survive cheating and the answer is, “Absolutely when both partners are willing and want to save their relationship.”
Relationship Help After Your Partner Cheats Tip #4:
Support System
Make sure to put your support system into place. This includes your friends, family, along with professional assistance. Whether you chose to stay and save your relationship or create a new life for yourself, you will need lots of emotional support during this time.
Relationship Help After Your Partner Cheats Tip #5:
Plan Of Action
It is imperative to create what I like to call a “plan of action.” This either is a step-by-step guide to save your relationship or let it go to move forward with your life.
Relationship Help After Your Partner Cheats Tip #6:
Grieving
Getting over your partner cheating involves going through a real grieving process. This is due to the loss of the ideal you held of your relationship, the trust you had in your partner, and grieving the actual relationship you and your partner did have.
Relationship Help After Your Partner Cheats Tip #7:
Restore
The final step is all about rebuilding. Whether you will be doing this with or without your partner, it is vital to begin moving forward. Starting over in your relationship or on your own does not have to be filled with intense pain. It is possible to embrace this time, turn it around, and come out of it stronger, wiser, and happier than ever before.
If you need some help in this area please feel free to reach out to me here.
Acclaimed Relationship & Life Coach Bree Maresca-Kramer M.A. holds a Master’s Degree in Mental Health Counseling, has over sixteen years of clinical experience working with individuals and couples. Bree has been featured on NBC, CBS, The CW, FOX NEWS, National Radio Programming, The Chicago Tribune, Shape Magazine,In-Touch Magazine, The Nest Magazine, Woman’s Day Magazine, E-Harmony, AOL, and is a Relationship Expert Columnist for The Huffington Post.
http://itsthatsimple.ws/
Can’t Get Over Her?
Relationship Help For Men
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer
She broke your heart, your friends are telling you to “forget about her, just get out there again,” and yet you are still holding on to her. You find yourself on an emotional roller coaster riding the high of fantasizing about how good things were with her and then feeling the drop as you sink into feeling depressed about losing her.
Does this sound familiar?
Being in this position is absolutely brutal but I have good news for you! Depending on the reason of the break-up you can win her back or you can successfully move on with your life.
Since you are still holding on, it is most likely that you would like to win her back.
Each woman, relationship, and situation are unique, however, if there is a way to win her back, I will help you find it. If there is not, I will guide you each step of the way of letting go and moving forward to creating a new life that is happy and fulfilling.
Relationship Help For Men
I have been working with men, women and couples for over sixteen years. I have helped couples save their relationship even when there was…
- An Infidelity
- Financial Problems
- Trust Issues
- Communication Problems
- Intimacy Issues
- Too Much Fighting
- Loss of Respect
- Sexual Issues
As well, I have helped both men and women get over their ex and create a whole new exciting life filled with wonderful experiences and a great loving relationship that works.
Relationship Help For Men
The bottom line is staying in a place of limbo never helps. It is time to either get her back or get over her!
Reach me here and we will get started right away!
http://itsthatsimple.ws/
Why Does He Call Me A Nag?
Relationship Help For Women
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer
Frequently, the biggest error a woman makes in her relationship is what men refer to as nagging. The relationship problems that stem from this are simply because a woman does not consider it nagging and the man does.
When a woman looks to her partner to get something accomplished she will request that of him. Generally what occurs next is that the man categorizes and files it in his brain as a “need to do it immediately task” or “this can wait, I will get to it task.”
However, he does not communicate this to her and she believes it will be taken care of immediately. When this does not happen she will ask repeatedly until she becomes angry and frustrated with him. Do you recognize this dynamic within your relationship?
If so, there is hope! Below are relationship help advice tips to help solve this problem.
Relationship Help Tip #1:
Pay Attention!
That means to listen to your partner. Instead of “hearing” what you want to hear, pay attention to what he is telling you. Is he stressed at work? Is he overwhelmed with home projects? Are the kids draining his energy?
Relationship Help Tip #2:
Take Action!
By taking a proactive stance with her listening skills, a woman can change this common relationship problem in no time.
What do I mean by this? It’s simple, instead of listening for what you want to hear, you become objective and listen to what he is actually telling you.
For example, if he is in the middle of a massive project at work and under a tremendous amount of stress, not asking him to fix the garage door until he is on more stable ground takes care of it.
The paradoxical part of this relationship problem is when effective communication skills are used it never exists.
Relationship Help Tip #3:
Change It!
I can help you with your relationship either by suggesting you read It’s That Simple! A Woman’s Book On Relationships, Life, Ourselves And The Healing Of It All or suggest you reach out to work with me one-on-one.
In the book you will learn incredible relationship help tools, information, and practical skills to apply to your life and relationship that will create unbelievable positive changes for you.
If you would like more personal attention, I will join with you and help you each step of the way to making your relationship better then ever before. Please feel free to reach me here. I look forward to hearing from you!
http://itsthatsimple.ws/
Not Sure About Staying In Your Relationship?
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer
Relationship Help
Facing the choice to either stay or leave your relationship is never an easy place to be in. Feeling torn and unsure about what to do can be a torturous experience.
The first step is to gain absolute clarity of what issues are causing you to question the permanence of your relationship. Many times a person may feel it is just easier to end a relationship rather than face what is truly going on. I always advise both men and women to stop before making such a decision and address what is wrong first. The regret of letting a relationship go and later wishing you had not is an even more difficult place to be in.
I am often asked, “Bree can this relationship be saved?” My rule of thumb is to always try and heal what is wrong before exiting the relationship. The only time I would not suggest this is when there is abuse occurring in the relationship.
So how do you try to fix what is wrong? There are several options available:
Relationship Help
- Talk through the things that are bothering you with your partner.
- Come up with workable solutions to resolve what is creating the discord.
- Make a tangible plan of action your partner and yourself can do to make changes in your relationship; and then follow through on them.
- Read a good relationship help book that gives you great information, tools, and guidance on how to improve your relationship.
I recommend It’s That Simple! Relationship Help Book for Men & It’s That Simple! Relationship Help Book for Women.
5.Seek out the assistance of a professional. Be sure to pick someone who specialized in relationships and has the education and experience to deliver the help you need.
Relationship Help
One final thought, before making any major decision about your relationship ending, try imagining your life without the person. Can you see yourself moving on happily without them or will there be something missing? If there will be something missing then be sure to take the steps to save your relationship before just walking away.
http://itsthatsimple.ws/
Looking to Your Partner To Give You Something They Can’t?
Relationship Help
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer
In my work over the years, I have found that both men and women enter into relationships with unrealistic expectations. They idealistically jump in with a picture of what a great relationship should be but end up very disappointed when their partner does not deliver it. Some would say that women tend to due this more frequently than men, however, in my work I have found it to be equal on both sides of the sexes.
So Why does this happen?
Relationship Help
Most commonly this occurs because the person feels a certain void or “lack” within them and tries to fill that with their partner.
This never ever, ever works! Why?
Simply because of the fact that a person cannot heal or fix that empty space within another human being. That can only be accomplished by the person doing what I like to call their “inner work.” This inner work involves honestly looking at oneself; the good and the not so good parts, taking personal responsibility, learning how to accept and love oneself and doing the healing work that is necessary.
Relationship Help
Another reason this happens with people is that they have bought into a false idea of what a healthy relationship really is all about. This happens due to television, movies, and music that sell the “fantasy” of a relationship and not the reality of one.
For women, this has commonly been called the “Cinderella complex.” It is the buying into the fairytale of the prince saving her and experiencing a happily-ever-after that does this to women.
For men, there is no such name, yet they hold onto the vision of the “perfect women.” This woman will be beautiful, sexy, smart, talented, want sex constantly and take care of all of his needs while not having any need of her own. Of course this does not exist, but men have also bought into the fantasy.
Relationship Help
So what are realistic expectations to have when it comes to a healthy relationship?
- Everyday will not be magical and filled with grand romance.
- The sex will not always be earth shattering and incredible.
- There will be days where one or both partners are in a bad mood.
- Your partner will eventually do things that annoy you.
- You will wish certain things about your partner were different.
- There will be moments when you will question your relationship.
- There will be times when you have a mis-communication with one another.
- You may go through tough times like a job loss, health issues, or financial struggles.
- You will have to compromise.
- You will feel angry at, frustrated with, disappointed in and hurt by your partner.
However you can also expect:
- Having times when the sex is unbelievable and the Earth does move!
- Your love to grow deeper and more profound as time passes!
- Feeling deeply grateful for having your partner in your life!
- Feeling loved and supported by your partner!
- Wanting to share all the good with your partner!
- Having fun just by being together!
- Creating a life full of meaningful memories!
- Laughing together and sharing joyful times!
- Learning more about yourself!
- Having a best friend and lover to walk through life with!
http://itsthatsimple.ws/
How To Have A Great Relationship! Help From An Expert
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer
Relationship Help
Men and women frequently ask me, “Bree, what is the secret to a great relationship?” I have found that what these men and women are really looking for is the answer to, “What am I doing wrong?” Usually, their current relationship is not working or their last relationship ended for reasons they just cannot figure out.
The wonderful news is that with the right information, understanding what works and what does not, a great relationship is very possible!
Relationship Help For A Great Relationship!
Honor
Although the concept of “honor” may seem a bit old fashioned, it is critical for a healthy relationship to occur. So what does a couple look like who honor one another? They show each other respect and treat the other accordingly. When a person respects another they are careful to not offend or harm them in anyway. When a couple does this for each other, they create a strong and lasting bond.
Relationship Help For A Great Relationship!
Kindness
Yes, being kind is vital for a great relationship! It may seem overly obvious that couples should treat one another kindly but surprisingly many couples act very unkindly to their partner. When a man or woman is considerate and acts in caring ways to his or her partner, this creates a powerful and intimate connection between them.
Relationship Help For A Great Relationship!
Communication/Conflict Resolution
One of the top mistakes couples make is not learning effective communication and conflict resolution skills. A couple who does not know how to talk with each other end up having a disproportionate amount of misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and arguments. These then lead to unresolved resentments and a break down in their relationship. This is such a common problem that I dedicated a whole chapter to it in the It’s That Simple! Relationship Help Books for men and women.
Truly, investing in learning in these skills not only saves relationships it creates happier more loving ones!
Having a great relationship does not have to be difficult! Treating your partner as you would a treasure you cherish, learn how to talk with him or her, learn how to work through conflicts that arise and you too can have a great relationship!
http://itsthatsimple.ws/
Stress Killing Your Relationship? Here Is Some Help!
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer
Relationship Help & Advice For Stress
Stress creates a break down in our bodies, which leads to a plethora of health issues. However, did you know stress is one of the primary elements that destroy relationships?
In my work, both men and women report feeling stressed out or overly stressed on a daily basis. This causes them to feel fatigued, overwhelmed, anxious, and short tempered, which they often take out on their partner.
Now, these men and women are not intentionally behaving this way to create issues in their relationship, they just do not have effective stress management skills to handle their daily stressors.
In fact, once they learn these skills and use them, they find that their relationship deepens and grows even stronger!
Relationship Help & Advice For Stress
Stop!
The first step in preventing your stress from ruining your relationship is to stop what you are doing and take a break. For instance, if you just come home from work feeling quite stressed out and your wife greats you at the door with a “honey-do-list” tell her you need to stop and take a time out first!
Go for a walk, exercise, take a hot shower/bath, do deep breathing exercises, journal, listen to your favorite music, pray, meditate, etc. By taking the time to participate in a de-stressing behaviors, you will be able to clear the stress from the day instead of taking it out on your partner.
Relationship Help & Advice For Stress
Talk!
Most of the time when people are stressed out they bottle up those feelings on the inside and assume everyone around them, especially their partner, understands what they are feeling. The fact is that no one, especially those closest to you, can know exactly how you are feeling until you tell them.
Therefore, when you feel stressed, you need to communicate that to your partner. Let him or her know what is creating the stress for you. Often times, the mere act of “getting it off your chest” will reduce your stress level greatly.
By talking about your stress, it lets your partner become clued in on where you are emotionally and avoid taking your stressed out emotional state personally.
Relationship Help & Advice For Stress
Plan!
Plan ahead by making a list of de-stressing activities that work for you and have them readily available when needed. De-stressing techniques that work for one person may do absolutely nothing for another. Therefore, it is vital to plan ahead and know exactly what works the best for you.
Someone in the middle of feeling stressed out usually cannot pull it together enough to figure out what to do to feel better. That being said, it is important to keep a copy of your list on the refrigerator, in your car, in your bathroom, office etc.; to ensure you can refer to it quickly and easily and then follow the plan.
Taking care of your stress level is not only imperative for your health it is essential in keeping your relationship functioning on a happy and healthy level.
If you are having issues in your relationship and need help please feel free to contact me here!
http://itsthatsimple.ws/
Divorced With Kids & Dating? Here Is Some Help…
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer
Dating Help & Advice For Divorced Parents
Going through a divorce is hard enough and then when you throw on top of that adapting to becoming a single parent and trying to date, it can become quite an overwhelming mess!
If you are experiencing this in your life it is important to know that you are not alone. Most men and women have a hard time adjusting to their new dating life, especially when they have children.
The good news is that is does not have to be so difficult! With a few simple steps you can create a healthy and happy dating life!
Dating Help & Advice For Divorced Parents
Kids First
Divorce can have incredibly negative effects on children. The best move a newly single parent can make is to check in with their children to ensure they are coping well with the massive changes that come along with a divorce.
Some children adapt more easily than others do. Some children may outwardly express their upset while others keep everything inside. It is vital to talk with your children and let them know that their feelings are normal and encourage them to express them.
Depending on the circumstances of your divorce, it may be a good idea to seek counseling for your children to ensure they are adapting well. When seeking a counselor, make sure to pick a mental health professional who specializes in treating children.
Dating Help & Advice For Divorced Parents
Finding You Again
Once your children are coping well and adapted to the new way things are, a great opportunity awaits you.
In order to be ready for dating, healing and knowing who you are and what you like is vital. Often, while in a dysfunctional marriage both men and women will lose themselves and become someone they do not even recognize any longer. It is important to take your time to heal first and be really clear on what type of partner you are looking for.
Dating Help & Advice For Divorced Parents
Pre-Qualify
Be sure to pick people to date that like children and welcome them into their life. There is nothing worse than falling for someone who is not a “kid” person! When you first get to know someone prequalify them by asking questions that will let you know if they like children and would be a good role model in your children’s lives.
Dating Help & Advice For Divorced Parents
Dating Rules
The most important rule for dating with children is to keep your dating life and your children very separate. This holds true until you become very serious about one person and want to start a real relationship with him or her.
When this happens for you, introducing your children, even adult children, to your new partner should occur under the most comfortable circumstances for all involved.
Dating Help & Advice For Divorced Parents
More Dating Rules
Dating in front of your children needs to be done with a considerate amount of awareness of how your children are feeling about the situation and your new partner.
In the beginning it is best to treat your new partner as you would a good friend. Showing physical affection to him or her too early may create your children to feel as if he or she is a treat rather than a potential new part of the family.
Being a single parent and dating is not easy. I will repeat that since it is so important to understand…being a single parent and dating is not easy at all!
Balancing work, parenting, daily stressors, and dating is a very large and full plate. It takes concerted effort to make sure each area of your life is being attended to fully. Many men and women in this situation find that one or more areas suffer leaving them feeling guilty, overwhelmed, and lonely. The great news is that it can be done!
If you are struggling and need some help please feel free to reach out to me here!
http://itsthatsimple.ws/
Why Are Relationships So Hard?
Relationship Help
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer M.A.
Believe it or not I hear this question almost on a daily basis! I believe the question that is really being asked is, “Why do I have so much trouble with my relationship(s)?”
To begin, relationships are fragile. Why? Quite frankly because humans are involved!
Each of us, no matter how evolved, have some issues that need addressing and healing. These are the parts that negatively affect our relationships. Makes sense right?
So am I saying that it is impossible for anyone to have a healthy and happy relationship? Absolutely not!
Relationship Help
Great relationships are very possible when you have two partners willing to look at themselves, work on their issues, and come from a place of love. In other words, none of us is perfect but when we take personal responsibility for our own stuff and treat our partner (and selves)with kindness, respect, understanding, and love great relationships happen!
This is quite simple to say but to be honest, not so simple to do for many people!
Living this out on a daily basis takes being focused, determined, and making the daily choice to do so. It is really about making your relationship healthy and happy, a priority each and every day.
The couples I work with want to be able to do this but just do not posses the skills. They were never taught how to effectively communicate, how to be in a healthy relationship, or how to come from a place of understanding.
The beautiful thing is that once they learn and apply the relationship help skills I teach them, they are able to create the relationship they always wanted!
For some couples, the incredible changes in their relationship comes quite quickly; for others it takes a longer time. It truly depends on the level of damage that has occurred in their relationship and the level of commitment of each partner. Honestly, I have had couples screaming hateful things at one another, wanting a divorce turn around to be able to heal and create a loving relationship.
Relationship Help
If you need some help with your relationship, the best thing you can do is reach out for help. There is hope for your relationship! Contact me here and together we will transform your relationship.
http://itsthatsimple.ws/
The Truth Of Why She Is Not Happy With You!
Relationship Help For Men
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer M.A.
Does it seem that no matter how hard you try to please her, that she still ends up upset about something you did or did not do? If this describes your experience with the woman in your life, please know that you are not alone!
One of the top pleas for help I receive from men in a relationship or marriage is, “How do I make her happy?”
This common problem in relationships was one of the facets that inspired me to write
A Book For Men on Relationships, Life, Ourselves And The Healing of It All
When the same problem shows up in relationship after relationship, there must be a common denominator as to why. The fact is that there is! What women want from their men is simply not being delivered and the women are very angry about it.
An ironic piece of this relationship problem is that the women are not telling the men what they want.
Why?
Mainly because women have this unspoken belief that “If he loved me he would know what I want from him!” To make matters worse this belief is compounded with “If I tell him and he does it then it does not count!”
Wow! How is a man supposed to win with this impossible trap?
Relationship Help For Men
The first step is gaining an understanding that many women carry this unspoken belief around in them, sometimes not even realizing they have it. When a man understands this, he is able to jump over this hurdle with ease.
The second step is to learn what the majority of women secretly desire from the man in their life. I say secretly because again this is something they will not come out and announce to you.
The third step is to open the door to effective communication so that you and she may move through this problem to a simple and workable solution. The word “effective” is key because communication can go on all day long, but if each person is not hearing the other and reflecting that back in the conversation that communication is never effective.
Relationship Help For Men
After working with men and women for over twenty years, I compiled all of the main issues and problems they face in their relationship and provided an easy step-by-guide on how to solve it in the It’s That Simple! Relationship help book for men.
If you are one of those men who do not like to read or who do not want to read a book to get the answers then feel free to contact me here and we can work one-on-one to help your relationship!
http://itsthatsimple.ws/
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