Relationship Help From Expert Bree about Blame
One of the more common questions I am asked is, Is this my or my partners fault? Someone asking this question is genuinely looking for real relationship help advice because they are feeling frustrated, angry, and confused about how to handle the situation in their relationship.
Let go of the idea of assigning blame. This sounds easy but can be difficult for many to do within the relationship. This requires one to forget about trying to figure out whose fault it is and instead focus on finding a solution.
After letting go of the habit of blaming one must then move onto identifying the real issue within the relationship. This is a vital step in successfully resolving any relationship problem one may be experiencing.
Once the core issue is identified, it is time to move onto addressing each person’s perception and feelings concerning the issue. This can get tricky with many couples because often people would rather be right versus finding a resolve.
Following each person listening to and validating their partner’s feelings and perceptions, even if they do not agree with them, it is time to take personal responsibility. This means that each person owns up to his or her part of the problem in the relationship without blaming the other.
Finally, it is time to find a mutually acceptable resolution to the problem in the relationship. This can be accomplished when both partners do the above-mentioned steps and find a solution together.
Acclaimed Relationship & Life Coach Bree Maresca-Kramer M.A. holds a Master’s Degree in Mental Health Counseling, has over fifteen years of clinical experience working with individuals and couples, and has been featured on NBC, CBS, The CW, FOX NEWS, National Radio Programming, The Chicago Tribune, Shape Magazine, In-Touch Magazine, The Nest Magazine, Woman’s Day Magazine, E-Harmony, AOL, and is a Relationship Expert Columnist for The Huffington Post.
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