The Little Things That Make A Difference In A Relationship
Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer M.A.
A smile filled with delight to see you, a longing wink from across the room, or a little kiss with “I Love You!”… these simple things can make all the difference in your relationship.
Why?
These forms of “acts of love” keep your relationship fresh and intimate on a daily basis as well as helping to protect it from the trappings of daily life. The bills, career demands, house, kids, and all of the daily responsibilities can become the primary focus, leaving your relationship forgotten on the back burner.
As with most things in this life, when we do not put our intention or focus on something, it can cause it to become damaged or to simply fade away. This is true in business as well as our relationships — more specifically for the purpose of this article, our intimate relationship with our partner.
It is easy to shift our focus onto all the “things” which can take our attention away from our partner and leave our relationship vulnerable to damage or simply the loss of it. However, it does not require daily grand gestures of love to keep you and your partner intimately connected. It takes the intention and focus to remember each day to share with your partner in simple little ways how you feel about them and what they mean to you.
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For example here a few simple things to keep your bond strong:
- A little love note on a post-it sticker placed where they will see it
- A warm smile and hug when they are leaving or coming home
- A text saying “thinking about you makes me smile”
- A moment taken to look into one another’s eyes and say “I am so grateful for you”
- A phone call in the middle of the day just to say “I am thinking of you and I love you”
These simple little acts of love, which take merely a minute or two, can make the difference between having a strained relationship or a fulfilling one.
It is important to mention here that in order to give in this way to our partner; we must first remember to provide for ourselves with loving intention and focus. When we provide for ourselves daily self-nurturing and self-care, we are able to give to our partner and those around us from a much greater and deeper place. When we neglect our own self-care, we are often left depleted and feeling as if we have nothing to give, even simple little things. Taking the time to care for ourselves on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level is just as vital as caring for our partner, children, job, friends, and family. Actually, when we do not take this time for our own self-care, we not only do not have it to give to those around us, we can end up causing harm to those around us. This harm can occur in all sorts of ways. It could show up as verbally snapping, withdrawing, acting out behaviors or shutting down emotionally.
Certainly it is not our intent to hurt those around us, especially our loved ones, however, when we are living from a neglected place of self-care this is often the outcome.
Finally, one of the greatest rewards we can experience in our relationship with our partner is feeling loved by them and expressing our love to them. This is the good stuff of the relationship! This is the part, which makes it all worth it. So go ahead use the simple little acts of love everyday and watch as your relationship enjoys the fruits of this very little labor.