Monthly Archives: July 2013

Why Men Throw Away Great Women!

Relationship Help For Women










Relationship Help 


Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer M.A.


She has everything he is looking for; she is beautiful, smart, sexy, funny, successful, great to be with, and treats him like gold!!! She is the whole package, every man’s dream. As their relationship begins to develop they have great fun and laugh together, have great chemistry for one another, and even introduce their friends and family to one another. Everything is moving along well with an incredible future together on the horizon. Then a slight hiccup occurs and he runs away leaving her shocked, confused and extremely hurt.


Then she comes to me for relationship help asking, “Why did this happen? What did I do wrong? I thought he was falling in love with me? I never saw this coming…what did I miss? ”


The answers for her and all other amazing women who find themselves in this position can be simply narrowed down into these following few categories.



Relationship Help For Women #1:




Even though he may come across strong and confident, deep down inside he does not feel that ultimately he is enough to make her happy.


For instance, he may feel he is not good looking or in shape enough for her, he may feel his penis is not large enough, he may even feel that his receding or thinning hair will turn her off one day. Perhaps he is worried he is not successful enough or that what he makes financially will not be enough to provide for them as a couple or family.


Most of the time, these things are greatly hidden from the woman he is involved with and in many cases from himself. Yes! Often a man is unaware of these insecurities about himself until he meets and starts falling for a woman who is incredible.


Unfortunately, instead of looking at these areas of insecurity in himself as an opportunity to grow and evolve as a man, he runs away.  He generally will find a woman that is less intimidating for him so that he does not have to look at himself but can feel good around another woman who has less going for her.


Sadly, she is left having to guess what went wrong in the relationship and frequently starts blaming herself.



Relationship Help For Women #2:


Emotionally Closed!


He may be incredibly affectionate, communicate about his daily life, and appear to be listening as she shares deeper parts of herself with him but he is emotionally shut down.


What does this mean exactly?


Somewhere along his life, whether in childhood or adulthood, he experienced something that created the need for a protective wall to be built around him. Whether it was never feeling he lived up to his father’s expectations, some type of abuse, or being stuck in a miserable marriage,  the coping mechanism he developed was to turn off his feelings so he could be ok in the situation.


As with all coping mechanisms, they serve a purpose at the time. However, can end up causing harm down the road when not let go of after the initiating experience is over.


In the case of a man being emotionally closed, his ability to not feel or at least to not feel things deeply served him well. Yet, when it comes to allowing real love and a great relationship with an incredible woman, it does not serve him well at all. In fact it makes him bail.


You see, once he starts falling in love, these strong feelings for her trigger a fear and ignite his once useful coping mechanism. In other words, a warning signal or “mayday” message is sent to his brain causing him to pull back and then find reasons to throw her away. In almost every case, he is dong this on an unconscious level and has no idea what is happening.


He most likely will find a woman to have a casual “friends with benefits” relationship with so that he does not have to face nor deal with any strong feelings for her.


Again, this is sadly another missed opportunity for personal growth and to chance to experience real love.



Relationship Help For Women #3:


Bad Timing!


Yes, there is such thing as bad timing when it comes to relationships. You can have two wonderful people who would be great together, but the timing just is not right.


In this case, he is not necessarily throwing her away, he is passing on her, all she has to offer him, and a relationship because he is not ready.


The most common time this happens is when he is freshly out of a broken relationship or divorce. He may want the companionship and love but just in not healed from his relationship or marriage.


An honorable man recognizes this in himself and tells the woman know right up front or as soon as he himself figures it out.

The problem that arises is that the woman does not hear him or want to hear what he is saying and hangs in there hoping he will come around.  When this dynamic happens in relationships, more times than not he will eventually throw her away as a level of respect needed for a successful relationship has been lost.



Relationship Help For Women



Learning that the great guy you thought was going to be “the one” falls into one or more of these categories may not end your pain but it does give you an understanding of what may have happened.


If you need more answers or guidance I would love to help you!

Reach me here and we will get started on healing the pain and attracting the right man for you!




Relationship Help Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer provides relationship help books online and free relationship help online.

For more information on Relationship Help Online please visit Bree’s website

Divorce Alternative From A Relationship Expert

Divorce Alternative










Marriage Help


Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer M.A.


Let’s face it, people in love who get married are not signing up for a miserable relationship followed by a painful divorce. No! They are expecting the love to last and a great life-long relationship together.


However, when people do not have the right communication or relationship tools things can go very wrong.  They can go so off course that the person finds himself or herself thinking the only answer is divorce.  However, there is an alternative and that  is choosing to heal their damaged relationship.


Outside of real abuse, most divorces can be avoided!


Yes, that is quite a profound statement to make but in my work with men, women, and couples it is very true!


Marriage Help


When a couple has reached the point that they feel there is no other way out then divorce, great damage has definitely occurred in their relationship. However, there is a way to heal the wounds and learn successful relationship tools such as:


  1. Understanding One Another’s Needs & Desires!
  2. Giving & Receiving Love That Keeps Your Marriage Strong!
  3. Getting The Spark Back and Keeping It Going!
  4. Talking With Your Spouse In A Positive & Loving Way To Avoid Fights
  5. Knowing How To Handle A Conflict Without Tearing One Another Apart


Yes, learning how to do this with your spouse, even when things have been very bad between you is very possible. The only requirement for this to occur is simply willingness! If you are willing to learn and heal you can save your marriage and avoid a divorce.


Most people do not have the right tools to make a relationship work long term, yet if they are willing to learn how and try a whole new world of possibilities opens up for them and their marriage.


I know it can feel like there is no hope at all, but with a bit of willingness all the broken pieces in your relationship can be fixed for good!


If you find yourself facing a divorce and want to save your marriage reach out to me here  and I will help you right away!





Relationship Help Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer provides relationship help books online and free relationship help online.

For more information on Relationship Help Online please visit Bree’s website

The Best Relationship Help For Men! From Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer M.A.

Relationship Help For Men








Relationship Help For Men



Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer M.A.


Men looking for relationship help need to know one thing about women…they are different from you on every level!  This may sound like a no brainer but you would be surprised at the number of men who sail by this concept as if it did not matter. They talk and treat the woman in their life like they would another man and cannot understand why she is always angry with him.



Relationship Help For Men Tip #1:


The Foundation!

Men need to fully get that a woman is not going to think, act, feel, or process information the way they do. First and foremost, in order to “make” a woman happy and have a great relationship, men must understand this. The next step is to stop expecting women to act or be like them, for this is the greatest mistake men make in relationships with women. Men must know women will be emotional creatures for that is the case.


If her feelings are hurt, she feels scared to take the next step in the relationship, or she is looking for assurance of your feelings for her, the only answer is to provide that for her. Do this knowing it has nothing to do with you or her being a drama queen rather she needs more emotionally from you. Provide that for her and watch her become happier and closer to you!



Relationship Help For Men Tip #2:


The Motivation!

Men are motivated by sex and that is the bottom line.  When a man is interested in a woman, his primary motivation is to get her into bed as soon as possible. He will do, say, and act in a way that he feels will work in attaining this goal. The ironic part of this is that women are not motivated by sex and see these attempts a mile away!



The smart man realizes that women are motivated by emotionally connecting and forming a relationship with man.  Therefore, understanding this and putting the emotional connection first is vital.


Relationship Help For Men Tip #3:


The Secret!

Once a man learns how women think and feel, he has the key to unlock a woman’s heart and be in an amazingly successful relationship. Most of the men I work with are currently in a relationship that is not working, dating women that are wasting their time and money, or are single and looking for the perfect woman. In each of these cases, learning all about a woman is the secret.


I guide my male clients step-by-step through this learning process until they fully know how to not only understand women but how to be in a great and lasting relationship with them!



If you find yourself in anyone of these boats, I can help you too!

Contact me and you will learn everything you need to know!





Relationship Help Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer provides relationship help books online and free relationship help online.

For more information on Relationship Help Online please visit Bree’s website

Broken Hearted? How To Turn It Into A Blessing!

Relationship Help










Relationship Help For Men & Women



Relationship Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer M.A.


When someone you care for or love tells you any version of these types of things…


• They feel your relationship is great but they see it headed down the road of marriage and they are not sure that is what they really want with you.

• They have found someone else.

• They do not feel for you what you feel for them.

• They are unhappy and want out of the relationship.


…the emotional pain can be excruciating!


Rejection in any form hurts immediately but it also sends a person into an emotional state that feels horrible which can last for some time. This is especially true when it comes out of the blue and blind sides the person.


The bottom line is when this happens you most likely are shocked, hurting and probably even angry that the very person you allowed into your heart and life has created this heartbreak and pain for you.


The question now becomes  what do you do next?


Relationship Help


Basically you have two choices.


The first involves you allowing this to turn you sour on love and that person, leaving you damaged.


Yes, you can blame them, think or even say nasty things about them, point the finger and play the victim card of “how can you do this to me?” However, in the end, handling it in this way solves nothing. In fact, it does something even more negative, it creates a layer of pain  you carry with you into your life and next relationship.


The other choice, which of course is the reason I am writing this article, is to encourage you to find the lesson and heal.


In every heart break there is an incredible opportunity for personal growth.


Although that may sound a bit “Poly Anna” it is the truth. When we can get out of our own way and stop feeling sorry for ourselves, we can expand our understanding of ourselves, and become a richer and deeper person for it. We can move forward stronger, wiser, and even more capable of fully loving another and ourselves.


How does a person do this?


Well, first there is the pain. Yes, you will have to feel the pain of the person you care for or love rejecting you. It hurts and there is no way of getting around it. You may want to skip this part, which many do, by drinking, drugs, sex, shopping, working, jumping into another relationship…you name it. However, the fact is that to fully heal you must feel and walk through the pain to the other side. This is a vital part of the grieving and healing process for you.


Second, you shift your perception. The fact is that we never own or possess another as our own. It may feel as if that special person is yours but in reality each of us is our own person and on our own journey through this life. If your partner feels not ready for the next step or that you are not right for one another that is their right. For example, if a person is scared of moving forward with your great relationship, it usually has to do with their past experience and fears. Therefore, allowing them to be who they are and where they are on their personal life journey helps you heal.


How? Because you honor the fact that you are separate souls having this human experience and that they are where they need to be to get them to where they need to go. In other words, accepting the truth of what is for the person helps you move on more quickly. Holding onto the person or the relationship because of how you feel about them only keeps you stuck in the pain.


There are certainly times when a person wakes up and realizes they threw away the best thing that could ever happen and you are able to reunite and make the relationship work. However the person must come to that awareness on their own. Therefore, chasing them, trying to convince them of how great you are, or that you belong together does not work. Accepting what is and moving forward in the healing process is the healthiest thing you can do for yourself.


Thirdly, you search for the lesson in the experience for your own personal growth. Is there anything you could have done better in the relationship? Could you have been more communicative, more giving, more understanding, more compassionate, or more willing? If so, learn from that and take that wisdom with you to do better in your next relationship. Perhaps there is a childhood issue that surfaced for you. Certainly for those with abandonment issues this is an awesome chance to heal that deep wound once and for all.


Finally, you take the good and leave the rest. Instead of trashing the person and your time together you can choose to see all the good and love that you were blessed to experience.


Life is a sequence of experiences that we can always chose to extract the beauty from. After all, if you truly cared for or loved the person that does not go away just because they do no want to be with you any longer. Carry the love and allow it to expand you as a person.


The worse thing you can do is to become bitter and emotionally shut down. Even though that may feel better in the moment in the long run it leaves you empty and void.


In the relationship and self-help books It’s That Simple! for men and women you have the opportunity to walk through the healing process whether you are in a relationship or not. There is a chapter on “Healing The Inner Child” that is incredibly helpful for men and women, especially during a break-up.


If you feel you need more help than a book I want you to know I am here for you!

Reach out to me here and I will help you get through this time and turn it into a blessing in your life!




Relationship Help Expert Bree Maresca-Kramer provides relationship help books online and free relationship help online.

For more information on Relationship Help Online please visit Bree’s website

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